Humble Tidbits of Vacuity

You have no idea how difficult this is for me. I’m sure there are plenty of things I could write about here, if I weren’t so indifferent about, well, pretty much everything.

I’ve seen many blogs across the tubes of the Internet where the author has asked his/her readers “Why did you start your blog?” I’ve never answered this question because I never had an answer other than, “I dunno.” But I’ve been thinking about it in the back of my mind for quite some time now. And while I don’t have an answer that starts with something like, “I started my blog in order to ________,” I will say that whenever I do post something, it makes me feel good.

Why is that, you might ask?

Well, I think it’s because writing stuff down forces me to pay attention to and engage things I’ve seen and done in my life…something that I don’t do all that often.

But, Kevin, that doesn’t make sense. How can you not pay attention to and engage things that you, yourself, have been a part of?

Good question, and maybe those are the wrong words. I just know that in the past 2 weeks, I’ve played racquetball twice, gone to and indoor water park, gone to Dave & Busters, dealt with my car (which is on its last legs) not being able to start for 30-40 minutes after turning it off, and helped coach 3 basketball games. And I don’t really have anything more to say about having done any of it, other than factually state that I did those things. It doesn’t matter to me whether I did those things or not, and I often have to think very hard about what I could write about. It’s almost a chore for me to identify something I could write about and then actually write something more substantial than “I went to the grocery store today.”

“Horse hockey!” you might say. You might also say, “You’ve had this blog since 2003. Don’t tell me you have a hard time coming up with things to write about.”

Well, truth be told, I’m actually rather surprised that I’m still making posts after almost 5 years. And also, it takes me a while to write my posts (unless, of course, it’s a funny video I want to share). I would say that, on average, it takes me about 2 hours to write my posts. That, of course, doesn’t count the time I spend thinking about what I’ve done and seen that interests me enough to say more than, “I went to the grocery store today.” In fact, it’s taken me about 4 hours over the last 3 days just to get to this spot in this post. I’ve gotten e-mails from a few people who’ve said that they liked my blog, but wished I would post more often. That’s fantastic that someone would say that. But it’s just so damn exhausting for me to a) identify something interesting enough to write about and b) talk about why it was interesting, how it made me think/feel, etc.

And I’m sure someone out there is going to say something like, “You’re over-thinking it.” But I HAVE to over-think it. Otherwise my post would read like, “Read the paper today.” “Water in the shower wouldn’t turn off.” “Ate dinner.”

But that’s exactly how I go through my life. It’s ridiculous the amount of effort it takes for me to expound on any of it.

This post was hand-crafted especially for you by Kevin at 1:13 PM |